Old pop stars on tour: Alice Cooper, Rod Stewart, Stevie Nicks, Suzi Quatro and Daryl and John

Ageing rock stars and bands reforming and touring is nothing new. But lately I've had a case of serious deja vu along with a series of flashbacks to my misspent youth. It's amazing how many old codgers are heading Down Under so they can get cashed up for Christmas. 

And why not? The Australian dollar is strong (or it was until last week when the market went belly-up) and us Aussies apparently have spare cash spilling from every orifice.

I could drown in a blast from the past by forking out to see - 

Daryl Hall and John Oates (supported by Icehouse): The tour is branded 'Two bands that Defined a Generation'. Here's my take - I had a crush on the moustachioed duo (ok, only one had a mo but I wanted to use the word 'moustachioed') and I used to perform a whiny rendition of She's Gone while I sobbed out my teen angst. I also had a mini crush on Iva Davies, lead singer of Icehouse (an Australian band). Then again, I had crushes on every boy pop star back then - except Gary Glitter (he was always super creepy). To say these performers 'defined a generation' is stretching it. Does this mean the children of the '70s are all lightweights? (DON'T ANSWER THAT)

Suzi Quatro: When I was 13, I phoned a radio station and won tickets to see Suzi Quatro at the Hordern Pavilion. This was back in the day when Quatro had a scary bikie following. She was and still is, aged 61, a trouper. And she still looks and dresses the same - like a '70s rock chick. I'd be in it just to hear Devil Gate Drive live again - if I won a ticket to the show.  

Rod Stewart: I saw RS when I was 14. My friend Kathy Mullaney was obsessed with the kilt-wearing Scotsman - she had Maggie May on replay on her record player - and bought us tickets to his SCG concert. We'd never been to an 'arena' style show and modelled our dress-code on Woodstock. We wore our bikinis under our jeans and T-shirts. Now Rod is much older and I am much wiser.

Alice Cooper: I used to catch the bus to school every day and Liz Kenny, who was in my year, was at the same stop ranting on about her obsession with Alice. I never warmed to Liz... or Alice. Still, School's Out remains the school-leavers' anthem after almost 40 years. But I have no desire to return to the bus stop.   

Stevie Nicks: I almost forgot to mention sweet Stevie, who must have THE best cosmetic surgeon because, despite years of drug and alcohol abuse, she looks amazing. I saw (sort of) Fleetwood Mac, Santana, Little River Band (and some other group I should remember but don't) at a concert at the SCG the day after I finished my final Higher School Certificate (HSC) exam and school was out forever. I just happened to be off my face at the time (having plundered the Esky), consuming enough booze to sedate a rampaging hippo. I'm embarrassed to admit I can't recall much of anything from that night.  

And that's just around half-a-dozen old codgers on tour. Stevie Wonder's coming too and I would love to see him live but the platinum tickets for his only Australian gig at the Star Casino cost $979.90. 

What a joke. I'll have to make do with a Best of Stevie Wonder CD.

Whatever happened to the rock chick?

Downloaded onto my brand new purple iPod by brother-in-law Davo are an eclectic selection of songs that hark back to the '70s.

I'm having a great time getting all nostalgic. You know how it goes... "Those were the days, weren't the '80s great, etc..." In fact, the '80s really sucked for me.

Now I know how old people get to be so annoying: "In my day we respected our parents and teachers..." or "When I was a kid, we were allowed to run free in the bush (causing devastation in our wake), burn leaves with a magnifying glass (thereby sparking off numerous wildfires) and spend all day in the sun and surf (which is why all my generation now has skin cancer)."

But my point, or rather question is this: whatever happened to the rock chick?

I've been listening to Joan Jett, Deborah Harry from Blondie and the incredible Chrissie Hynde from the Pretenders. The songs are so cool, meaningful, hard-nosed, flirtatious and sung with real commitment. There's none of this yodling Beyonce fat-bottomed jiggling pussy-in-your-face garbage.

And who is this Lady Ga Ga? Scary stuff. And chicks like Rihanna who send out the message that it's OK if your boyfriend bashes the crap out of you - just go back to him and pretend nothing happened (footballers girlfriends here in Australia do that - so sad). Give me a break.

I want real women singing real songs - playing their own instruments. Bring back Debbie and Chrissie and dare I say it (though she only had one good song) Joan! Bring back Suzi Quatro, Chrissie Amphlett (Divinyls) and those women of rock with real heart and soul.

Shivers, does anyone remember Slade? Mama, we're all crazy now is playing on my iPod as I write! Whoo-hoo!