Thursday, 17 September 2009

An 'entire' male doesn't make the cut

I was down on the oval walking my dog Karma the other day when we encountered a Borzoi and its owner.

This dog is huge, but not in terms of weight. Underneath its long flowing mane, the Borzoi appears to be almost skeletal and reminds me of another-worldly type of creature. Its frame is large and it has the height of a pony. Freakish.

The Borzoi's owner is just as unusual. He is around 60 and wears neatly pressed cream trousers and shirt. His silver grey hair and healthy yet ruddy complexion evoke images of the English country gentleman with hound. And get this - the guy smokes a pipe! (I bet he wears a cravat on more formal occasions).

Anyway, the Borzoi leaps gazelle-like towards my dog, a medium-sized Kelpie cross, who cowers behind my legs. My poor old nothing-but-a-pound-dog is terrified of the Borzoi.

In an attempt to diffuse the tension, I ask the owner: "Is it a male or a female?"

To which he replies: "It's an entire male."

Entire male? Who gives a toss? I just wanted to know if it was a boy or a girl dog.

If I had been quick on the uptake I would've responded with: "Karma prefers them un-entire."

Or asked: "Does that mean you haven't had its balls cut off?"


Some men are wankers. Entire or un-entire.


Anonymous said...

Borzoi - a hairy entire male - brings back the discussions on whether your hero male can have a beard. Danny Boy (unentire male. not that it is stopping him)

Shayne said...

That's drawing a long bow!

Are you implying that beardless is un-entire?

If so, there go the zillions of books with titles such as: The squillionaire unbearded Italian sheikh boss and the secret baby secret.


jenn j mcleod said...

Gotta love a dog story. This was a good one. I have to tell you, we see new people and their dogs arriving daily at our little dog-friendly B&B and sometimes I have to stop myself laughing when I see the resemblance between dog and owner. I can safely say I DO NOT look like my dog - yet. Give me a few more yeras and more white hairs and it could happen.