I was down on the oval walking my dog Karma the other day when we encountered a Borzoi and its owner.
This dog is huge, but not in terms of weight. Underneath its long flowing mane, the Borzoi appears to be almost skeletal and reminds me of another-worldly type of creature. Its frame is large and it has the height of a pony. Freakish.
The Borzoi's owner is just as unusual. He is around 60 and wears neatly pressed cream trousers and shirt. His silver grey hair and healthy yet ruddy complexion evoke images of the English country gentleman with hound. And get this - the guy smokes a pipe! (I bet he wears a cravat on more formal occasions).
Anyway, the Borzoi leaps gazelle-like towards my dog, a medium-sized Kelpie cross, who cowers behind my legs. My poor old nothing-but-a-pound-dog is terrified of the Borzoi.
In an attempt to diffuse the tension, I ask the owner: "Is it a male or a female?"
To which he replies: "It's an entire male."
Entire male? Who gives a toss? I just wanted to know if it was a boy or a girl dog.
If I had been quick on the uptake I would've responded with: "Karma prefers them un-entire."
Or asked: "Does that mean you haven't had its balls cut off?"
Some men are wankers. Entire or un-entire.